To be honest, for once I don't really have anything which I need to rant about. Or I can't think of anything off of the top of my head, so this might be a bit boring! It's just basically an update on life. I've finally started cracking on with some university work, one because I'm bored, and two because being a second year is slightly scary and I don't want to fail. My university has decided that they want to test us, by giving us some seriously hard books to read. I guess this will do us good in the long run, making us more educated in literature, but until that point of realisation I will continue to think "these books are fucking boring."
Aside from becoming more knowledgeable in literature, I've been out with friends most of the time, or spending time at the gym trying to get the "dream body", which will never happen, because food is just too good. I've been to Alton Towers twice this holiday, and I still love it. The adrenaline rush has kind of gone though, mainly because I've been on the rides so many times I know exactly what's coming. Bring on America. My student loan is slowly getting lower and lower, mainly being because of my car, which just seems determined to make me poor. It's working, £50 a time on petrol... could have bought a new outfit for that, terrible.
It's been nice catching up with friends who I've not seen for a long time. Especially those who I went to school with, as we can sit for hours and talk about school memories. We then feel old for doing this, and realise that we'll soon be sorting out our future careers and trying to find someone who can survive being married to us. Wow, times change. It's also amazing being at home, it's like royalty. No cooking, cleaning or washing. Cups of tea are on demand. Strangely though, I am missing living away from home. I miss my independance. Yet I know it'll come round before I know it, and then I'll be missing people from home again. It's a situation in which I can't really win. Also, before I know it, I'll be back from America, the Christmas tree will be going up, and then I'll be turning the dreaded 20. Life is going incredibly fast!
Wednesday, 18 July 2012
Saturday, 14 July 2012
"How do You Stay so Strong?"
Quite a few people ask me on a regular basis the question "how do you stay so strong?" To be honest it's quite a hard question to answer, but to put it simply I just tell people to "get on with it". Until the last two years, my life has been quite a breeze. I didn't experience any childhood drama such as bullying. My parents are happily married. I'd never experienced any tragic disasters, such as death. I guess this made my childhood quite easy, I was rather carefree. I didn't really care what people thought, I just simply enjoyed life.
It was in my late teenage years when I started to experience some of the cruel events which occur in life, such as the death of my grandad. This was the first family member which i'd lost, and as awful as the experience was it only made me stronger, and ready to face the more negative events which would come in the future. I had an incredibly difficult year, including my dad having a heart attack, and soon after my relationship ended when my boyfriend at the time fell for another woman. Yet again, the incidents only seemed to make me stronger. These incidents were all going on at the time of my A levels, and as hard as it was, I put all my effort into passing them. This evidentially payed off, since I'm now at Lincoln University.
My attitude to life is that you only live once. It's spontaneous, not planned. Of course, there will be hard times but there will be many more positive ones. I don't tend to let things affect me. When an incident happens, I cry and talk it through, but then I tend to just try and move on, and it works. Keep yourself happy by arranging positive things. You have to be strong within life and not let the negative things defeat you and bring you down, otherwise you'll be upset all of the time. You have to try and stay happy and strong. Through a rough patch, remember that it won't last forever, and soon you'll be smiling again. People who've hurt you before are no longer in your life, they don't deserve your tears. Besides, there are plenty more people who care about you and want you to be happy, so smile for them but only if you mean it. Never fake a smile, it'll just make you feel worse, it's much better to talk things through with someone who cares.
Each morning, listen to a song which makes you instantly happy. It'll set you up for the rest of the day. Having ups and downs in life is all part of the journey, here's where the cheesy line "life's like a roller coaster" comes in, but it's kind of true. Be your own person, don't take shit from others, and remember that you're only here once.
It was in my late teenage years when I started to experience some of the cruel events which occur in life, such as the death of my grandad. This was the first family member which i'd lost, and as awful as the experience was it only made me stronger, and ready to face the more negative events which would come in the future. I had an incredibly difficult year, including my dad having a heart attack, and soon after my relationship ended when my boyfriend at the time fell for another woman. Yet again, the incidents only seemed to make me stronger. These incidents were all going on at the time of my A levels, and as hard as it was, I put all my effort into passing them. This evidentially payed off, since I'm now at Lincoln University.
My attitude to life is that you only live once. It's spontaneous, not planned. Of course, there will be hard times but there will be many more positive ones. I don't tend to let things affect me. When an incident happens, I cry and talk it through, but then I tend to just try and move on, and it works. Keep yourself happy by arranging positive things. You have to be strong within life and not let the negative things defeat you and bring you down, otherwise you'll be upset all of the time. You have to try and stay happy and strong. Through a rough patch, remember that it won't last forever, and soon you'll be smiling again. People who've hurt you before are no longer in your life, they don't deserve your tears. Besides, there are plenty more people who care about you and want you to be happy, so smile for them but only if you mean it. Never fake a smile, it'll just make you feel worse, it's much better to talk things through with someone who cares.
Each morning, listen to a song which makes you instantly happy. It'll set you up for the rest of the day. Having ups and downs in life is all part of the journey, here's where the cheesy line "life's like a roller coaster" comes in, but it's kind of true. Be your own person, don't take shit from others, and remember that you're only here once.
Cheating.
Cheating. It's a thing that's so common we hear about it on a regular basis, whether it's from someone you know or being publicised within the media. Each individual knows cheating is classed as a bad thing, so why do people continue to do it? One simple answer could be, the person is a coward. They are cunning, and plot behind their partners backs (the ones are they supposed to love). They daren't tell their "love" that they no longer want to be in a relationship with this person. What a wimp. For one, I would never cheat on a person, because if I was no longer happy within a relationship I would have the curtsey to say. The person deserves some sort of respect, especially if they've been with you for a significant amount of time.
From personal experience, cheating is an incredibly heartbreaking experience. Yet you pick yourself up, learn from your mistakes and move on. It's good to have an inside knowledge, as I can now identify when something isn't right within a relationship. It's easy to spot the key things which indicate that something's up. For instance, they may be spending a lot of time on their phone, and when you ask they become incredibly defensive and instead turn the blame on you being "paranoid". They don't seem to be as intimate with you anymore, they always seem on edge and never relaxed. This clearly isn't normal behaviour. Follow your gut instinct, as it's normally correct. If you feel that something is wrong, it's your bodies way of defending itself and telling you to flight from the situation, or even fight if you find evidence that your partner is cheating.
Cheating is always something which makes me annoyed and angry. It doesn't seem like a morally correct thing to do, especially to someone who you're meant to care about. When a friend is cheated on, it's left to me to pick up the pieces and put them back together again, all because their partner didn't have the courage to tell the truth. Yes, the truth may sometimes hurt, but it's better to be hurt quickly rather than over a long process, which normally will take twice as long to heal. To anyone who would never dream of cheating and hurting their partner, well done to you. You're the decent, kind and truthful individuals which are needed within our society.
From personal experience, cheating is an incredibly heartbreaking experience. Yet you pick yourself up, learn from your mistakes and move on. It's good to have an inside knowledge, as I can now identify when something isn't right within a relationship. It's easy to spot the key things which indicate that something's up. For instance, they may be spending a lot of time on their phone, and when you ask they become incredibly defensive and instead turn the blame on you being "paranoid". They don't seem to be as intimate with you anymore, they always seem on edge and never relaxed. This clearly isn't normal behaviour. Follow your gut instinct, as it's normally correct. If you feel that something is wrong, it's your bodies way of defending itself and telling you to flight from the situation, or even fight if you find evidence that your partner is cheating.
Cheating is always something which makes me annoyed and angry. It doesn't seem like a morally correct thing to do, especially to someone who you're meant to care about. When a friend is cheated on, it's left to me to pick up the pieces and put them back together again, all because their partner didn't have the courage to tell the truth. Yes, the truth may sometimes hurt, but it's better to be hurt quickly rather than over a long process, which normally will take twice as long to heal. To anyone who would never dream of cheating and hurting their partner, well done to you. You're the decent, kind and truthful individuals which are needed within our society.
Friday, 13 July 2012
English.
I'm an English student, so surely I should be a massive book-worm, right? Wrong. Since beginning my course at university, reading books has been something which has turned more into a chore than a pleasure. It's difficult to accept because I used to love reading as a kid. Reading expanded my imagination, allowing me to dive into all kinds of fantasy worlds, a true escape from reality. Back then, I read what I like. Yet now, I read what I'm told. It kind of makes me not want to do it, sort of like a rebellion against the cruel lecturers at university.
In all honesty though, there have been some books which I've been forced to read which have made their way onto my list of favourites. For instance, "The Great Gatsby" is quite a tragic love story, twisted with the idea of living within a fake society, a world in which everyone was obsessed with money. The women didn't marry for love, they married for money. Marriages almost always ended badly because being unhappy in the marriage led to cheating. To be honest, this kind of indicates that money isn't everything. These days, people tend to marry for love instead of money (even though the divorce rate is now 1 in 3 couples, which is actually appalling). Although, the concept of marrying for love is probably biased on my behalf, as I'm quite a romantic and I'd never marry for money, yet some selfish people will. Going back to the original point, the book is interesting because it's so unlike our society today.
Another one of my favourite books which I have been forced to read is "The Catcher in The Rye", a tale about a boy experiencing the troubles all teenagers face. He troubles with trying to fit into society, growing up and talking to the opposite sex. He seems to hate the idea of adulthood, and constantly tries to remain a child forever (basically those annoying people who need to act their age). At some points of the book, I could relate to the narrator. He is incredibly sarcastic, something which I seem to be fluent in these days. There were times when I wanted to tell the narrator to grow up and sort himself out, yet there was something likeable about him. It's strange how someone who doesn't exist can have such an impact on you, something which I've always loved about literature.
I love the idea that I can escape to some sort of fantasy world at anytime, even if it does seem a task with some of the awful books which the university makes me read. Books which have an everlasting affect on me means the author must be incredible. It's incredibly interesting how each author writes so differently, as a reader you're able to expand your imagination and knowledge just from picking up a book. I do complain about how much I have to read all the time, which is more than likely my fault as I picked an English course... well done me.
In all honesty though, there have been some books which I've been forced to read which have made their way onto my list of favourites. For instance, "The Great Gatsby" is quite a tragic love story, twisted with the idea of living within a fake society, a world in which everyone was obsessed with money. The women didn't marry for love, they married for money. Marriages almost always ended badly because being unhappy in the marriage led to cheating. To be honest, this kind of indicates that money isn't everything. These days, people tend to marry for love instead of money (even though the divorce rate is now 1 in 3 couples, which is actually appalling). Although, the concept of marrying for love is probably biased on my behalf, as I'm quite a romantic and I'd never marry for money, yet some selfish people will. Going back to the original point, the book is interesting because it's so unlike our society today.
Another one of my favourite books which I have been forced to read is "The Catcher in The Rye", a tale about a boy experiencing the troubles all teenagers face. He troubles with trying to fit into society, growing up and talking to the opposite sex. He seems to hate the idea of adulthood, and constantly tries to remain a child forever (basically those annoying people who need to act their age). At some points of the book, I could relate to the narrator. He is incredibly sarcastic, something which I seem to be fluent in these days. There were times when I wanted to tell the narrator to grow up and sort himself out, yet there was something likeable about him. It's strange how someone who doesn't exist can have such an impact on you, something which I've always loved about literature.
I love the idea that I can escape to some sort of fantasy world at anytime, even if it does seem a task with some of the awful books which the university makes me read. Books which have an everlasting affect on me means the author must be incredible. It's incredibly interesting how each author writes so differently, as a reader you're able to expand your imagination and knowledge just from picking up a book. I do complain about how much I have to read all the time, which is more than likely my fault as I picked an English course... well done me.
Tuesday, 10 July 2012
Lucid Dreaming.
Whilst at a friends recently, I came across a concept which i'd never heard of before, called lucid dreaming. At first, I thought my friends were a bit crazy when they first started describing it, because it's such a strange concept. The simple idea is that you develop a skill which enables you to control what happens in your dreams. Usually dreams are all in the self conscious right? You can't control what happens in your sleep. Apparently, with practise you can. So I thought i'd try and begin the process, if I can anyway.
To start, you have to create some kind of log to record your dreams in. I've just decided to have a notebook and a pen beside my bed. Turns out, it's harder than you first think. Usually when I wake up from a dream, I forget it straight away, and then I end up getting incredibly frustrated, especially if the dream was immense. In order to lucid dream, you apparently have to train yourself to remember your dreams, hence the dream journal. I also don't seem to dream a lot either, so it's going to take me a lot longer to get used to the concept. So far, i've remembered about two dreams.. in about a week. Useless! If you ever manage to crack the concept though, imagine the possibilities? I could marry whoever I wanted, live in a huge house, fly or change my appearance. To put it plainly, if I can control my dreams it will be immense, and kind of like being in your own movie.
I was also told that I needed some sort of reality check, which I found incredibly strange at first. For instance, putting your thumb to the palm of your hand. If your thumb goes through your hand, you know that you're dreaming (or injured, one or the other). It sounds a bit messed up really, but I'm willing to give it ago anyway, just to say that i've done it.
To start, you have to create some kind of log to record your dreams in. I've just decided to have a notebook and a pen beside my bed. Turns out, it's harder than you first think. Usually when I wake up from a dream, I forget it straight away, and then I end up getting incredibly frustrated, especially if the dream was immense. In order to lucid dream, you apparently have to train yourself to remember your dreams, hence the dream journal. I also don't seem to dream a lot either, so it's going to take me a lot longer to get used to the concept. So far, i've remembered about two dreams.. in about a week. Useless! If you ever manage to crack the concept though, imagine the possibilities? I could marry whoever I wanted, live in a huge house, fly or change my appearance. To put it plainly, if I can control my dreams it will be immense, and kind of like being in your own movie.
I was also told that I needed some sort of reality check, which I found incredibly strange at first. For instance, putting your thumb to the palm of your hand. If your thumb goes through your hand, you know that you're dreaming (or injured, one or the other). It sounds a bit messed up really, but I'm willing to give it ago anyway, just to say that i've done it.
Tuesday, 3 July 2012
America.
I realised today that I go to America in about 4 weeks. I have never been so excited for anything in my life! Ive been once before in my life but I think I was only 8, so I can't really remember anything. I have blurred visions of the famous Disney castle, featured at the beginning of every disney film. I can't wait to see it, especially now I have a decent camera! Disney land is definitely going to be the highlight of my holiday. Normally, people dressed in costumes normally scare me. When I was 8 and I saw a character, I ran in the opposite direction. Not this time, my fear will be faced. Mickey mouse will become my new best friend!
Aside from the characters, I'm especially looking forward to the rides. Alton towers is my favourite place in the uk, so America will be an absolute dream for me. Rita and 13 are starting to become a bit tame for me, so bring on the tower of terror (the name says it all). Im ready to be scared, I need a decent fix of adrenaline. Disney land is the chance to become a kid again, for three weeks only, aside from playzone at Lincoln, haha! We're also going to the universal studios, and that means going to the world of Harry potter, which I am incredibly excited for! I've already informed my mum that I will be buying a wand, trying butterbeer and buying sweets and gadgets from the weasleys shop. Exciting times ahead!
Aside from the excitement of being a child again, we're also going to a place called sanibel island in Florida. From the pictures, it looks like heaven. The island is completely isolated, with white beaches and blue seas. On top of that, we're staying in our own villa. To be honest, I am beyond excited. I'm ready to go. I will enjoy every minute of it, as once that's over I've got a stressful year at Uni to worry about. Once re-freshers is finished anyway ;)
Aside from the characters, I'm especially looking forward to the rides. Alton towers is my favourite place in the uk, so America will be an absolute dream for me. Rita and 13 are starting to become a bit tame for me, so bring on the tower of terror (the name says it all). Im ready to be scared, I need a decent fix of adrenaline. Disney land is the chance to become a kid again, for three weeks only, aside from playzone at Lincoln, haha! We're also going to the universal studios, and that means going to the world of Harry potter, which I am incredibly excited for! I've already informed my mum that I will be buying a wand, trying butterbeer and buying sweets and gadgets from the weasleys shop. Exciting times ahead!
Aside from the excitement of being a child again, we're also going to a place called sanibel island in Florida. From the pictures, it looks like heaven. The island is completely isolated, with white beaches and blue seas. On top of that, we're staying in our own villa. To be honest, I am beyond excited. I'm ready to go. I will enjoy every minute of it, as once that's over I've got a stressful year at Uni to worry about. Once re-freshers is finished anyway ;)
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